WedPics Featured Couple: Lisa & Jim

Hear from newlyweds Lisa & Jim on their wedding planning journey, their thoughts on traditions and their advice on putting together the perfect wedding!

Photos by  Gabriela Bucero Photography

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 1) If you could choose just one, what was your favorite moment from the wedding weekend?

Choosing just one moment of my wedding weekend truely is difficult! However, I would have to say one of the most special moments was after we were announced as Mr and Mrs and walked down the isle, we reentered through doors in front of the church and greeted each row of our guests to excuse them from the church pews. We felt this was a way for us to thank each guest individually for coming and to spend a moment each of them as some of our guests weren’t coming to the reception. It also made the recieving line go faster and less wait time for those standing.

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2) What wedding traditions did you incorporate into your wedding and which ones did you intentionally leave out?

My husband and I agreed on both including traditions and excluding certain traditions. During the wedding ceremony itself. I wore a traditional vail however I did not want to/didn’t wear it over my face. We had the traditional church wedding where my father gave me away to my husband in a Baptist service. At the wedding reception we did not do a garder toss. It didn’t fit our styles do to this in front of our families. And we found that with both of us being in our 30’s (he in his later 30’s) we found this tradition to be less tactful. We gave each other wedding gifts before the wedding ceremony began.

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3) What kind of personal touches did you add to your wedding?

My style of decore at home is very rustic in nature and my husband loves International Harvester Tractors. We were able incorporate both in our wedding. I was able to use many natural elements throughout the day, including decorations with pinecones, peices of wood for our cake displays, recycled aluminumn food cans (that we cleaned and decorated) for decorations. And  I surprised my husband with an International Harvester Tractor ice sculpture from a local vendor.

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4) If you could give one piece advice for future couples planning their wedding, what would that be?

If I could give one piece of advice to any future bride and grooms I would encourage them to slow down, take in every moment and make sure you have a professional photographer and friends taking snapshots throughout the day for you. My sister married a few years back and hired a family friend to take her wedding photos, unfortunatly not a single picture turned out of her day. She however relied heavily on guest pictures. Using Webpics is an excellent idea. I would also encourage you to hire someone with professionl equipment that has experience. I got married only a bit over a month ago but I frequently look at our pictures and am so happy we had a professional photogrpher!

Congrats Lisa & Jim!  If you were recently married and would like to be featured on our blog, email us at blog@wedpics.com!

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Marriage Isn’t For You – Seth Adam Smith

Seth and Kim Family PhotoSome amazing perspective about marriage has been circulating the social media airwaves recently and for good reason.  Seth Adam Smith, a somewhat recent newlywed (1.5 years) and phenomenal writer, put heart to “paper” and wrote an amazing piece on what marriage truly is and should always be.   His original post, “Marriage Isn’t For You”, can be found here.

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By Seth Adam Smith

Having been married only a year and a half, I’ve recently come to the conclusion that marriage isn’t for me.

Now before you start making assumptions, keep reading.

I met my wife in high school when we were 15 years old. We were friends for ten years until…until we decided no longer wanted to be just friends. 🙂 I strongly recommend that best friends fall in love. Good times will be had by all.

Nevertheless, falling in love with my best friend did not prevent me from having certain fears and anxieties about getting married. The nearer Kim and I approached the decision to marry, the more I was filled with a paralyzing fear. Was I ready? Was I making the right choice? Was Kim the right person to marry? Would she make me happy?

Then, one fateful night, I shared these thoughts and concerns with my dad.

Perhaps each of us have moments in our lives when it feels like time slows down or the air becomes still and everything around us seems to draw in, marking that moment as one we will never forget.

My dad giving his response to my concerns was such a moment for me. With a knowing smile he said, “Seth, you’re being totally selfish. So I’m going to make this really simple: marriage isn’t for you. You don’t marry to make yourself happy, you marry to make someone else happy. More than that, your marriage isn’t for yourself, you’re marrying for a family. Not just for the in-laws and all of that nonsense, but for your future children. Who do you want to help you raise them? Who do you want to influence them? Marriage isn’t for you. It’s not about you. Marriage is about the person you married.”

skwedding323It was in that very moment that I knew that Kim was the right person to marry. I realized that I wanted to make her happy; to see her smile every day, to make her laugh every day. I wanted to be a part of her family, and my family wanted her to be a part of ours. And thinking back on all the times I had seen her play with my nieces, I knew that she was the one with whom I wanted to build our own family.

My father’s advice was both shocking and revelatory. It went against the grain of today’s “Walmart philosophy”, which is if it doesn’t make you happy, you can take it back and get a new one.

No, a true marriage (and true love) is never about you. It’s about the person you love—their wants, their needs, their hopes, and their dreams. Selfishness demands, “What’s in it for me?”, while Love asks, “What can I give?”

Some time ago, my wife showed me what it means to love selflessly. For many months, my heart had been hardening with a mixture of fear and resentment. Then, after the pressure had built up to where neither of us could stand it, emotions erupted. I was callous. I was selfish.

But instead of matching my selfishness, Kim did something beyond wonderful—she showed an outpouring of love. Laying aside all of the pain and aguish I had caused her, she lovingly took me in her arms and soothed my soul.
Marriage is about family.

I realized that I had forgotten my dad’s advice. While Kim’s side of the marriage had been to love me, my side of the marriage had become all about me. This awful realization brought me to tears, and I promised my wife that I would try to be better.

To all who are reading this article—married, almost married, single, or even the sworn bachelor or bachelorette—I want you to know that marriage isn’t for you. No true relationship of love is for you. Love is about the person you love.

And, paradoxically, the more you truly love that person, the more love you receive. And not just from your significant other, but from their friends and their family and thousands of others you never would have met had your love remained self-centered.

Truly, love and marriage isn’t for you. It’s for others.

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