Wedding Etiquette: How do you announce an engagement and who should be the first to know?
by Stephanie

engagement announcement
engagement announcement

QUESTION: Who should be the first to know about my engagement? How do you announce an engagement after telling close friends and family, or should I announce it at all?

GINA'S ANSWER: Go with your gut and call the first person that comes to mind. It might be your best friend, your parents or your grandmother. Beyond the calls to close friends and family, you don’t have to make an official announcement unless you want to. You’re going to be excited, and your recent engagement is going to get revealed naturally through conversations, texts, emails and maybe even social media.

JESS' ANSWER: Your parents! Then siblings and best friends. A good rule of thumb is, if the situation were reversed, would you want to get a personal phone call announcing their engagement? Save text messages and facebook for those you don’t keep in close touch with anymore.

ASHLEY'S ANSWER: Your parents, immediate family, and anyone who might contribute financially to the wedding should be the first people you share your exciting news with. However, if you have super close friends they should hear about it at the same time. Traditionally, you would notify local news sources to announce the engagement. Typically, most people do not announce their engagement to the local newspaper as often anymore.

Depending on social status, traditions, and how formal your wedding will be, there are different ways to announce it. One formal way would be to send a letter in the mail to all you want to notify. More commonly now, phone calls are the first and fastest way to announce your engagement. Less formal ways are to email, use paperless post, create a blog, status update on facebook, tweet, or text message all you know. Since we live in an age where we are so connected mobily, ability in sharing with family and friends across the globe instantaneously is done easily. You will get the biggest response from your facebook and instagram networks.

Need more wedding etiquette, advice and tips? See previous etiquette posts here.

Gina and Matt_web_175
Gina and Matt_web_175

Gina Heideman is a bride-in-training from Boise, Idaho. When she's not planning her navy/preppy/downtown wedding, she spends her time perfecting her crab cake recipe, drinking wine and playing cribbage with her fiance, and playing outside. She's an avid swimmer, runner, gardener and reality TV junkie. By day she works as Executive Director of a statewide nonprofit organization that focuses on meth use prevention. By night she's a freelance graphic designer (

Jess Keys is a Journalism graduate of Indiana University, a Chicago transplant and Founder of The Golden Girl Blog. She was first bitten by the wedding bug at age 11, when she purchased her first Brides magazine in the Lexington, KY airport. She's partial to red lipstick, French Bulldogs, and a lover of the written word. When she's not writing for Wedding Party, you can often find her at the closest Dim Sum establishment, or exploring the Windy City with her camera in tow.

Ashley Smith is the wedding planner for Buzzworthy SF. She believes that purpose, craft, design, and strategy are all cohesive elements to produce a successful event. Ashley is available for weddings in California and worldwide. Her expertise is in the Bay Area, but her heart is in Mexico, where she is certified by the board of tourism to plan and work. If she is not in San Francisco planning weddings and being social, you’ll find her on the beach at Playa Azul, Papaya Playa, or exploring the coast lines in Central America via bicycle.

Photo via Melissa Green Photography.