In the following weeks of your engagement, people will often express their envy about the fact that you are wedding planning and continually say that “this is the most fun and exciting time in your life!”
While that may often be true throughout the wedding planning process, there also may be times of stress and thinking these people were crazy for telling you that wedding planning was all fun and games.
You may have close friends or family members that recently got married warning you of certain obstacles ahead, but there are certain situations that nobody can prepare you for.
Want a better idea of what to expect of the unexpected? Here’s a top 10 list of potential wedding planning blunders.
1. YOUR GROOM IS GRUMPY
Some brides-to-be may read too deep into this, thinking their future husband has had a change of heart and that she no longer is the girl for him. Don’t think this way! Your fiancé just may be acting like a guy that isn’t interested in flowers and proper invitation address etiquette.
2. SHOE SHOPPING PROVES TO BE MORE DIFFICULT THAN PLANNED
This may seem like a trivial issue, but wedding shoe shopping can be a difficult and stressful experience! If you don’t want sky-high stilettos or don’t want to spend a fortune on shoes you most likely only will wear for a few hours before changing into flats or flip-flops, the available selection is limited. It took me nearly six months of shopping online and in stores before I settled on a pair of shoes that were both comfortable and stylish to complement my wedding dress. My advice is to exhaust the use of Google Search and Shopping – you eventually should find something that works for you and your preferences.
3. VENDORS END UP COSTING MORE THAN YOU BUDGETED
No matter how strictly you stick to your wedding budget, it’s most likely inevitable that one or a couple vendors will end up costing more than planned. Perhaps you decided that you wanted an extra photographer, or you simply cannot live without shrimp cocktail as an appetizer during cocktail hour at the reception. It’s also possible that a vendor had to raise their prices or is charging you extra depending on your wants and demands. Regardless of the reason, try to have a financial buffer in place to help avoid any surprise extra expenses, and have a written contract in place that outlines the services and prices that each vendor is providing to you.
4. FAMILY MEMBERS AND FRIENDS HAVE AN OPINION ABOUT EVERYTHING
Everybody who’s anybody will all of a sudden come out of the shadows and offer up their advice and “expertise” in an attempt to help you during wedding planning. It could be a close family member or friend that you don’t even speak to on a regular basis, but several people will voice their opinion about every aspect of your big day. This can get rather annoying or irritating if you don’t set boundaries early on; do your best to stay calm and listen to what everybody has to say, but you’re also entitled to turn a deaf ear to those who don’t hold any merit or financial weight to your wedding plans.
5. YOUR PARENTS AND FUTURE IN-LAWS CLASH OVER PLANS
This is bound to happen when money is involved, but both sets of parents also could clash due to a lack of knowing one another. This can become a sticky situation because more times than most, the bride and groom get thrown in the middle and are left to mediate the problem. Consider getting your parents and your future in-laws together ahead of time before wedding planning is heavily underway to help iron out any issues and differences.
6. YOUR MAID OF HONOR AND/OR BRIDESMAIDS ARE NOT INVOLVED
In nearly every wedding party, there’s at least one individual who goes from being “so honored!” and enthusiastic about being a part of the big day to becoming either a diva or total downer. Weddings have a tendency to bring out the bad sides of even the nicest people – just be prepared to handle the situation in a calm, mature manner so it doesn’t blow up into a bigger issue than it needs to be. Hopefully you have others in your bridal party that can help you take control of the situation.
7. SO AND SO WANTS TO BE INCLUDED IN EVERY. SINGLE. ACTIVITY
Whether it be your grandma, your future mother-in-law or a close friend, there inevitably will be one person that believes they should be involved and present for every single wedding-related activity – whether it be dress shopping, picking out flowers, meeting with vendors, etc. When it comes to wedding planning, more is not the merrier – do not invite more people than necessary along to important events. However, do make a compromise when appropriate to keep your fear-of-missing-out person happy and involved.
8. YOUR MOM ALL OF A SUDDEN BELIEVES SHE KNOWS EVERYTHING
Even if you and your mom are the best of friends – my mom and I are! – the two of you at some point will clash heads during wedding planning. You reach a point when your mom thinks she knows what’s best for you, your groom and everybody involved in the wedding, and she will try to take over all the plans and details. Don’t be afraid to speak up – ultimately, your mom probably just wants you to be happy and help in any way that she can to relieve your stress.
9. … AND YOUR MOTHER-IN-LAW BECOMES OVERPROTECTIVE OF HER SON
As the wedding day approaches, your future mother-in-law probably will experience an epiphany that her little boy is all grown up and getting married. She may also struggle with the fact that she no longer will be the primary woman in her son’s life. It’s okay to humor her and be sensitive to her feelings throughout the wedding planning process, but don’t let her – or your groom! – forget who the woman in charge is.
10. THE COST OF AIRFARE AND ACCOMMODATIONS ANNOYS GUESTS
Even if you are able to negotiate a special discounted rate for your wedding guests at one or two local hotels, there still will be a select few that aren’t happy with the cost. And, since it’s not up to you to pay for out-of-town guests’ airfare, they also may complain about the cost of their airline ticket to attend the wedding. My recommendation of how to handle this? Oh well! If people aren’t happy about it, they simply can choose not to come. Trust me – guests that want to help you celebrate your wedding regardless of the cost or hassle to get there will make it work.
Although this list is just a preview of potential situations you could run into during wedding planning, just remember to always be prepared for the unexpected. And, don’t ever lose sight that this is yours and your groom’s big day – don’t let anybody or anything spoil the fun and exciting time that is, and should be, wedding planning!